This and That

Well, nothing too awfully exciting happened today so I thought that this post would be a little of this and a little of that. A list of randomness:

*Have you ever seen or eaten the Candy Cane Oreo Cookies? I saw them today at Wally World for the first time. Uhm...they are awesome!! I'm so glad I put two packages into the cart instead of only one. They are so yummy and pepper minty tasting. I really had to stop myself at 4. You should look for them at your local store. Oh, I bet they would be even better frozen, or dunked in hot chocolate!

*I think I finally might have my trip back to Youngstown rescheduled. As of now, I'm hoping to leave next Sunday and then stay until the following weekend sometime. I really hope Ohio and Michigan doesn't get nailed with snow, otherwise I won't be going. I haven't been to Ytown since October and I'm really missing all of my friends and the coaches. I'm really excited because going now means I will get to have Christmas with all of them as well. Hope and pray that the snow holds off, at least on the driving days.

*Tonight I took my 17 year old cousin to go and see Twilight. She already went once but said she would go again with me. Phew! I didn't really want to sit in a theater by myself...talk about depressing. I really liked the movie. The movie didn't have some scenes that the book had, but I think they did a good job eliminating parts of the book that really didn't need to be in the movie. The movie wasn't the least bit scary like I was kind of afraid it was going to be. I haven't started reading the second book New Moon, I wanted to wait until I saw the movie. However, now that I have seen Twilight I will be starting the second book before drifting off to sleep tonight.

*I think that this Tuesday on TV is my all time favorite Christmas cartoon. A Charlie Brown Christmas. I have always loved this one and it has always been my favorite Christmas show. It has such a great message in it and I absolutely love the end of it, I get tears in my eyes every time I see it. When Shawn and I first started dating he told me that Charlie Brown was his favorite too. We have watched it together every year. A few years ago Shawn even got me the DVD so we could watch it on different nights leading up to Christmas. Every year I would also get Shawn something Charlie Brown or Peanuts related. I now have a nice little collection of Charlie Brown items. I want to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas so bad this year, but I don't think it will be the same. I'm tearing up as I'm typing this just thinking of watching this year with out Shawn. I will still watch, up in my room, I know Shawn will be watching with me.

*Tomorrow I will be going to church with Sarah; her children and Sarah's friends Marni and Collette and their families. I'm excited to go, but nervous at the same time. I can't begin to tell you the last time I went to church. Our wedding was in a church but it was very short and I have been to a few funerals in a church. But actually attending a church service on a Sunday, I can't even begin to tell you how long it has been. Years and years and years I'm guessing somewhere around 15ish give or take. I feel like with everything I've gone through this is something I need to start doing. So tomorrow is a huge step for me!

*Here is a picture of Bo for you from last weekend. He was watching my brother put the lights on the Christmas tree. He was being very good and sitting on my lap. Like the pants? Oh~I almost forgot I need your help. Bo was sleeping through the night like a champ, but then this week it all changed. He has been going to sleep around 10:00 like he always has but then every night this week he has woken up at 3:00a.m crying, howling and barking. As soon as I open up his crate he gives me a kiss and then curls up next to me and falls asleep. It's like he just wants to sleep with me and be next to me. He will then sleep until 8:00ish in the morning. The only issue I have is I love snuggling with him, but I don't really think I want a dog sleeping under my covers and this is where he wants to be. I know I should just ignore him and eventually he will stop crying, but at the same time I can't let him cry for long in the middle of the night because he will wake every one up in the house. Does anybody have any suggestions for me or do I get to snuggle with a loud snoring dog?

*I want to give a HUGE thank you to Nancy~ In my mail yesterday I got a card from the Arbor Day Foundation saying that Nancy and her family made a donation in Shawn's name. As a tribute to Shawn 25 trees are going to be planted and registered in the Huron-Manistee National Forest. Thank you so much again Nancy for this. You are AWESOME!! Shawn will love it!

*Many of you have asked me the question: How do I think Shawn prepared me for all of this? Well I've been working on that post for a few days. I will post the answer one day soon. I just want to make sure the words come out exactly how I feel and sometimes that is hard. In the next few days I will be making that post and hopefully after you will all understand why I say that Shawn has prepared me for all of this.

*Overall today I had a 'good' day. I laughed a few different times, went shopping, and went to the movies. Even though I had a 'good' day I couldn't help but shake the feeling that I shouldn't be doing any of the things I did today. Instead I felt like, I should have been Christmas shopping with Shawn. We should have been attending the YSU football banquette today. Shawn and I should have been putting up our Christmas tree. We should be sitting in our living room, watching TV under the glow of our Christmas tree. Even though I had a 'good' day I was still so sad and empty feeling inside my heart. I miss Shawn so much, I can't stand the fact that he is gone and I can no longer feel his arms around me, I can't stand that I can't kiss him anytime that I want to and I for the life of me can't understand why he had to leave this earth so soon. I miss my husband, I miss my old life, and I miss my best friend.

*As I posted last week I went to the cemetery and put out Shawn's grave blanket. Shawn's cousin offered to make the actual 'blanket' for me and then they added some detail to it. Then we added a few more UofM touches onto it. It turned out exactly how I wanted it to look. Shawn will always have his UofM stocking with him.