A Little Tingle?

This post is going to be a little departure from my uhm rather serious posts I have been writing as of late. Originally I was going to blog about something else but woke up happy and in a good mood so I wanted to think about something else to write about. Then I went tanning and the post came to me. So this is going to be rather Happy Mayhamish http://happymayhem.blogspot.com/ vs. Tale of Two Coinish. Like I said...there will be happy on this blog too.

After doing a few things around the house today and after talking with Jennie I decided that I should head out to the tanner. Yes I'm a fake and baker, but I live in Michigan where it is cold, dreary and has little sun this time of year. I needed to feel warmth and the sun again. Albeit fake... but it works. Once I got into my car I realized that like an idiot I had left my tanning lotion outside all night and it was in more of the popsicle variety then actual lotion. I wasn't too concerned because I knew I could buy a sample lotion once I got there. So I went into the store and asked the lady at the counter what type of sample she recommended for a person with sensitive skin. She told me about five different kinds of lotions that I could try. She had lotions with bronzer in it, she had lotions with glitter in them and then there was a lotion with bronzer, glitter, and a skin tinter. All of which I knew I didn't want. After all I don't want to look like a Christmas tree ornament with all that bronzer and glitter. I just want a nice little glow. I asked her if she had anything without all the "extras" then she handed me a little packet and told me to try this because and I quote "This only has a little tingle and a soft pink color to it" I finally figured what the hell lets live on the wild side and went with the lotion with a little tingle. Off to my room I went.

I got into my room, got undressed and opened up the little lotion packet. The lotion itself smelled like a tropical pina colada. Since I love Pina Colada's I thought that this lotion would be just fine. I first rubbed the lotion in on my legs expecting to get a shock from the 'tingle' but there was nothing. I then rubbed the lotion on my arms and also felt no tingle. I figured well the lady must be right and there would be no tingle. So I then rubbed the lotion on the rest of me, including my face. Since I am a 'safe' fake tanner I grabbed my eye protection and jumped into my bed. At this point I was staring to tingle just a little, but nothing major.

I turned up the radio and got situated in my bed. Even better it was all 80's music. I shut the top of the bed and was in my glory. I was nice and cozy warm while listening to 80's music. What more could I ask for?...The first 3 minutes of my tanning experience was very relaxing, then out of no where my skin felt like it was being attacked by millions of little fire ants. Was this the "little tingle" that she was telling me about. So now I'm squirming around in the tanning bed, itching my arms, legs, stomach, and chest trying to get the tingle to stop. Guess what...itching makes the tingle worse...much worse. Just as I was about to say screw this and stop tanning the itch/tingle began to calm down to almost nothing. I then finished up my minutes in the bed, but was grateful when the lights went off. Although I was a little worried as to what the 'pink glow' was going to make me look like. I got up and slowly opened up my eyes fulling expecting to look like a gianormous piece of hot pink bubble gum. After all there was only supposed to be a little tingle and not fire ants. Much to my surprise the pink glow just made me look nicely tan with yes a glow. The only thing the pink glow did to me was bring out the many freckles that I have and well there isn't much I can do about that. I did leave the tanner smelling like a Pina Colada and that really only made me want one to drink.

The moral of the story: Don't leave your tanning lotion in the car overnight if you live in Michigan in the middle of winter and moral two. Don't believe the lady at the counter when she says "This lotion only has a 'little' tingle" Yeah...sure it does!