Today I'm Thankful #26

Well today is Thanksgiving. Duh! Nothing like stating the obvious huh?

I woke up today thinking how could it be Thanksgiving already. It feels like just yesterday I was at Jennie's celebrating Fourth of July. Time sure does fly. To me anyways it just doesn't feel like Thanksgiving. I'm pretty sure I feel this way because Shawn isn't here. It just doesn't feel like the Holidays without him, it feels different. I don't know if other people feel like it, but I just feel like something is missing. Maybe I feel like this because I'm the only one that is 'alone'. I know I'm not alone and I know I have many many great friends and family that are with me, but again, it just doesn't feel the same. With that being said, I will tell you that this year I'm feel much better than I was last year. So that is a big plus. I am a little bit more excited this year for Christmas, but I'm not totally all the way yet...but I'm getting there, and that is all that counts.

So with today being Thanksgiving I thought I'd share with you a list of things I'm thankful for:

*Even though my life with Shawn came to a sudden stop I will always be thankful for the time that we had together. I'm thankful for the things in life that he taught me and I'm thankful for the memories that I have of us that now make me smile.

*I'm thankful for my family that has been so supportive to me over the last 15 months. I really don't know what I would have done with out them.

*My friends! I really have no idea what I would have done without my friends. They have been there through the worst of times and also the best. I love my friends more than anything and am so blessed to have them in my life.

*My blogging friends. You guys have been great and so supportive. I'm still amazed at the fact that I have received so much love and support from people I have never met.

*I'm also thankful that through my blog I have been able to help other widows. I have said from that start that I wanted to help other people in my same situation. Being a widow is something that nobody can prepare you for unless you have walked in the shoes. I'm so grateful I am able to help other widows reading my blog.

*I'm also thankful that I have touched some of you with my story. I'm so happy that after reading my blog, many of you have no changed your relationships with your husbands. Many of my readers have emailed me saying that because of what I have gone through you no longer take your relationship for granted. I'm so happy that my story has changed so many of your relationships.

*I'm thankful for the friends in my life who have appeared since Shawn's death. God really does send you people when you need them the most.

*I'm thankful for my little puppy Bo. I've said it before, but I probably love him more than I should.

*I will never ever be able to say I'm thankful for Shawn's death. I still don't understand why it happened and I probably never will. However, I am grateful and thankful for what I have learned about myself since Shawn's death. I have learned more about myself in the last 15 months than I ever did before. I have learned that I'm a much stronger person than I ever thought possible. I now know that I will be able to make it through most anything that life throws my way. I have learned that life is extremely short, and that you should not take things for granted. I have learned to try and find joy and happiness in the simple things that life has to offer and to love people in a way that I never loved before. I want Shawn to be back more than anything. But I'm thankful for the lessons that Shawn's life and death has taught me.

*I'm thankful that now 15 months later I now having more happy days than sad days. I'm thankful that I'm now looking forward to the rest of my future instead of dreading it.

I hope each and every one of you have an amazing blessed Thanksgiving and thank you each for your love and support.