Proud Wife!

Hi to you all!!! I'm still in Youngstown having a great time! I really love being back here with my friends, their families and the coach's that I am still close with. Kind of makes me feel like moving back here. (more on that in another post)


Remember a few weeks ago when I posted about some big news dealing with Shawn? http://taleoftwocoins.blogspot.com/2009/03/few-random-thoughts.html Well today I was down at the football stadium talking to the Head Football Coach and he filled me in on a few more of the details. I can proudly now tell you the big news and you can better believe that I am so proud of Shawn. I only wish that Shawn could be here to share this with me. Anyways, a fellow Video Coordinator, Mark Quisenberry from Ohio State nominated Shawn for the Big Ten Video Coordinator of the Year Honor and guess what? Shawn won!!! Shawn is now in the running for The National Video Coordinator of the Year Award. The awards will be accepted the week of May 11-14 in Florida. I should find out then if not before if Shawn is awarded the National Video Coordinator of the Year award. When I was first told this a few weeks ago I got tears in my eyes. I was so happy that Shawn was finally getting some recognition for all the hard work, time and effort that he put into his job. Shawn took great pride in his job and always did his job to the best of his abilities. Many times Shawn went way above and beyond to make sure that everything was done top notch and that everything was always done for the other coach's. I know Shawn would be so humbled and honored to receive this award. Have I mentioned the fact that I'm so proud of Shawn and everything that he accomplished while he was a Coach? Just in case I haven't mentioned it...I'm so proud of Shawn and honored to have been his wife for the last 7 1/2 years. The link to YSU's press release is here in case any of you would like to read the complete story.
http://www.ysu.edu/sports/football/2009/coinhonor.htm

On another note this weekend marks two other big milestones for me. Saturday will be 8 months since Shawn has been gone. Also Sunday would have been my due date for our baby, this snuck up on me real fast. Many of the people I met on WebMd and had the same due date as me have started having their babies. I'm so happy for them, but it is so bitter sweet for me at the same time. As I have always wanted to be a Mommy and have a happy little family. I will be doing some fun things this weekend so hopefully that will help. On Saturday I will be going to a wedding with "T" and on Sunday I will be hanging out with Jennie and I think we are going to do something "fun".

It is still hard to believe how much my life has changed in just 8 short months. It's also funny for me to say short. In one way it has been the quickest 8 months of my life and in another the time during the last 8 months has gone by at a snails pace. There have been many many days where I just wanted the time to go by as fast as it could so the pain would go away. Now 8 months later I'm sitting here and so many things are different. Very few things in my life are the same and I'm at the point where I'm starting to look forward to the future and what it has in store for me. Although, I still think about Shawn every single day, about a million different times, and I still often cry for him and ask why and why did this have to happen to me. I'm also to the point where I'm more than half way through all of the first year things. I'm to the point where I'm relieved that the year is almost done but at the same time it makes me sad as well. Once the first year is up it just means that this part of my life is now in the past. As excited as I am starting to get for the future and what the future has in store for me it is so bitter sweet to let go of the past...to let go of us. It takes my breath away and makes my heart hurt thinking about that. How funny is that? To wish time would go by fast, but at the same time I want to hold onto it? I don't know, unless you have gone though something similar you may not understand what I am talking about. I know Shawn will always be with me every day, and I know I will always love and think about Shawn. But somehow the end of the year just makes everything that much more final and complete, as if having a funeral for my husband wasn't enough. So as I approach this weekend I would appreciate any extra thoughts and words of wisdom that you could give me.

Again, I'm so proud of Shawn for becoming the Big Ten Video Coordinator of the Year!!! I will let you all know if he wins the other award in a few weeks. Keep your fingers crossed and I will keep you updated.

I love ya Bub and I'm so very proud of you!!