Thank-you Coach Heacock

Well as most of you know last week I got back from another visit in Youngstown, I h ave been back in Michigan for one week as of today. Every time I go there to see my friends I also try to stop into the stadium to see the other football coaches that Shawn worked with. After Shawn died the entire football coaching staff and their families were so awesome to me. Even if it is only for a few minutes I try to stop in to say hello and let them know what I am doing and what I have been up to. This visit was no exception as I stopped down there on the day before I left.

The day before going to the stadium I went out to dinner with "my guys". My guys consist of 3 of the coach's that I am still really really close to. (there is actually 4 coach's that I'm close with but one of them got a different job at another college) Every time I come into town we try to get together and do something. Usually we go out to eat at our favorite restaurant where we all used to go when I still lived there. These 4 guys were all pallbearers in Shawn's funeral, they spoke at Shawn's funeral and they were all there with me in the ER the morning that Shawn died. They each have been there for me every step of the way since as well. After I moved back to Michigan I was really afraid that we would stop talking, but 6 1/2 months later we all still talk all of the time. I can't begin to tell you how much these guys mean to me. During dinner we of course talked about Shawn. We remembered the good times with him, and we also talked about the day that he died. We all shared what we remembered about that day with each other. We all remember a lot of the same things, but there are things that each of us remember that the others do not. While we were eating I asked if they had hired anybody for Shawn's position yet. They didn't hire anyone during the season as a way to honor Shawn, they all just took on extra work. However, with the season being over I knew the time was coming that a new coach would be sitting in Shawn's office. They told me that yes they had hired another guy to fill Shawn's job. I asked them what they thought of him. They all told me that he is a nice guy and that they think he will do a great job. Then they each told me that of course he isn't Shawn and that would be hard for them to get used to. They all miss Shawn just as much as I do and their daily life has been effected as well.

I then asked 'my guys' what they did with Shawn's name plate that was on the door of his office. I had noticed that it was no longer on the door. I was fine with this but I wondered what they had done with it because I didn't want it thrown out. I wanted it if thy weren't going to do anything with it. They each got kind of weird acting, so I asked them what was up. They told me that they didn't know if I was supposed to know this or not and that they weren't sure if it was supposed to be a 'surprise' for me. (so if you are reading this don't say anything to anyone :) ) However, they went onto tell me that they did have Shawn's name plate and that they were actually going to be naming the Video Room (Shawn's office) in his memory, complete with a big picture of him and his original name plate. I didn't but I almost cried when my guys told me that. Then they all asked me if I was ok with that. I of course said it was more than fine with me. We talked for a while longer before we all had to get going. I hugged each of them good-bye and told them that I loved them. "My guys" have helped me so much and they will always be a special part of my life.

The next day I went to the football stadium to see the other coach's. I didn't get to visit with all of them because it is a slow time of year and they all work at different times, but I did get to see and talk to a handful of them. Again the entire coaching staff has been wonderful to me since Shawn has died and that entire staff means a great deal to them. Each member of the coaching staff and a few other people in the Athletic Department all drove the 5 hours in a charter bus to come to Shawn's funeral. Who gets to say that a charter buss full of people came to your funeral?....only Shawn as far as I know. It still makes me laugh seeing the charter bus full of coach's pull up in front of the funeral home that day.

When I go to the stadium I always make sure to stop in and see the Head Football Coach, Coach Heacock. He too was there in the ER with me when Shawn died. He was actually the first person that met me in the door in the ER. He told me what he knew about Shawn and then hugged me like I have never been hugged before. I still get goose bumps when I think about the expression on his face when he saw me for the first time. I could be wrong, but I think he already knew that Shawn was gone. (I knew deep down too that Shawn had died and maybe someday I will share what happened that day with you all) Anyways, Coach was huge for me in the days following Shawn's death. He came to our house with in a few hours after Shawn died and asked me if there was anything that he could do for me. He also told me that he had cancelled practise for that day and an annual even that was to be held the next night. He told me he was bringing in clergy members for the players and others to talk to about Shawn's death. Shawn was pretty close to a big group of players. Coach Heacock also told me that the media was going to be "all over this" He told me that he would handle this and that he would handle it with the most respect and dignity that he possibly could. Coach did handle this in the best way possible. He did the interviews with the media and the newspapers so I wouldn't have to. He handled the situation in the best possible way and I will never forget what he did for me in the days after Shawn died.

Coach Heacock was also one of the Coach's that spoke during Shawn's funeral. He said the most beautiful things about Shawn. He talked about what type of a man he was, what type of Coach he was and all of the hard work that Shawn did for the team. There were many times in his speech where he got choked up and had to take a few seconds before continuing. This was when he told me that they were dedicating the entire football season to Shawn and that they were going to play every game for him. He also told us that Shawn's initials were going to be placed in a football and placed on the helmet of every player. That got me and I instantly started crying. I will never forget the words that Coach said about Shawn that day, and I will never forget what he did for me the days following Shawn's death and what he has done for me since.

So with this visit I wanted to make sure that I got to see Coach for a few minutes. I walked up to his office and noticed that he was sitting with his head buried in his hands at his desk. I gently knocked on the door. He looked up at me, got a smile on his face and said, "Well Jen Coin, come on in." I went into his office and we talked for a while. He asked me how I was doing and I told him. I told him for the most part I'm doing well and that after 6 months I'm starting to get things pulled together. He told me that he was very glad to hear that, he also told me that I'm a strong person and that there was no doubt in his mind that I wouldn't be ok. That really meant a lot to me. We talked about the fact that it had been 6 months since Shawn died and that in some ways it feels like yesterday, while in others it feels like so long ago. Then Coach told me something that really got me in the heart.

One of the job's of a Head Football Coach at this level is to do a variety of public speaking engagements. Coach went onto tell me that at the end of each of his speaking engagements he ends his speech with the Shawn Coin story. He told me that this was his way of keeping Shawn's memory alive in the football team and within the university. When he told me that I instantly got a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. (you all know how I hate crying in front of people) Coach told me that at the end of every one of his talks he talks about Shawn. Who he was as a person, as a coach, and what he did for the team. He told me he tells the audience about all the behind the scenes hard work that Shawn did for the team and how Shawn always went above and beyond what he had to do. Coach told me that Shawn travels everywhere with him and that he tells the Shawn Coin story where ever he goes. He went onto tell me that he has vowed that he will do this for every speaking engagement he does for the next year. It is the year of Shawn Coin and that he is proud and privileged to be able to tell and share Shawn's story to the people he speaks in front of. WOW! Is all I could think about when he told me this. I had no idea that Coach was doing this for Shawn. All I could tell him was "Thank-you for keeping Shawn's memory alive" I was honestly blown away by Coach telling me this. He also told me that he always has people coming up to him after he speaks asking more questions about Shawn and asking how I am doing. He told me that people actually stop him and ask about me. WOW once again.

Coach and I talked for a few more minutes. I told him over and over again how thankful I am to him for not only what he did for me after Shawn died, but for what he is continuing to do for Shawn when he speaks. What he is still doing for Shawn to me is even better than what he did for me. I love the fact that he is keeping the memory of Shawn and the person Shawn was alive. It still kind of takes my breath away to think about that. Coach then got up gave me a hug and walked me to the door. He told me that his next speech was in a few weeks and that he would be taking Shawn along for that trip as well. With that I hugged him back, told him I would see him on my next visit and walked out of his office with tears of gratitude in my eyes.

So I would like to thank Coach Heacock for everything!!! It means more to me than you know!! I love you and your staff and you will all always have a special place in my heart forever!!