Bo Pics & Post #50!!!

Before I get to all the "Big 50" post stuff, here are the latest pic's of Bo, he will be coming home next Thursday! I can't wait, it will be fun to have him with me. I will post pictures of him in his Halloween costume next Friday!!! His costume is a suprise. Sleeping puppy dog. This picture cracks me up, just how he fell asleep that way.

Still sleeping, and loves to cuddle with me.

Big tuff puppy trying to pull me across the floor!

Gotta love that cute little face! If you look close at the picture below you can kind of see the thumb print pendant I got after Shawn's funeral. (It's the pendant behind the journey pendant)Sorry its still not a great picture of it.

Well I just looked at my old posts and realized that this is number 50!! When I started this blog on June 15th I had very little to write about, I just kind of thought it would be something fun to do. After all I did waste so much time reading blogs by other people, why not start one of my own. Shawn made fun of me when I first started my blog, he told me that the two of us never do anything exciting so why would people want to read about our life. Good point, but I started one anyways because that's how I am. Every night when Shawn would come home from work he would ask how many people read or posted on my blog today. I always said one or two, I was very excited one day when I got to tell him that 10 people posted in one day. WOW!! (I can hear him laughing on days when I get more than 10 comments a day)

Who would have thought that almost 2 months from starting this blog, with such a boring life so many things would happen in my life. It blows my mind to think of everything that has changed since starting this blog. Here is a list...

*Started Fertility Testing at end of June, first test all clear.

*HSG on July 18, all clear.

*July 26th, the day I got pregnant (I know because I had another test done that day)

*Shawn started really not feeling good, started going to the Dr. on and off (12 times in total before he died)

*August 8-finally got a positive pregnancy test after 14 months of trying. We were both so happy!!

*August 16th-Took Shawn to the ER because he was having problems breathing- they said that he was fine and to go home.

*August 18th-The worst day of my life, my husband of 7 yrs died of a massive heart attack, that nobody caught after months of being in and out of the Dr's.

*August 24th-viewing at the funeral home

*August 25th-Shawn's funeral

*August 29th-my first Dr's apt. was told that I was measuring a week behind were I thought I was with the baby. My Dr. told me not to worry yet that the baby could still catch up. I was worried, I knew in my gut that something was wrong. I tried to tell myself that there was no way that somebody would have me lose my husband and baby within a few weeks of each other, but I was still worried.

*Sept.2-My family and I packed up our house and I moved back in with my Mom, Dad, and sister.

*Sept.4th-Went to my Dr. back in Michigan and found out that the baby had actually shrunk, and that there was still no heartbeat. I should have been a little over 8 wks pregnant, and was measuring only 5wks and 4 days.

*Sept. 8th-I had one last ultrasound just to make sure. It was still the same, still shrunk and no heartbeat. I wanted to miscarry on my own. I waited and waited, with nothing happening.

*Sept. 24th- I went in for a D&C because yet again my stupid body didn't cooperate with me.

*Sept. 30th-Went and looked at the puppies for the first time, went looking and came out a puppy mommy! At least one good thing happened to me the last 2 months.

*Oct. 7th-Ordered Shawn's headstone, I designed it myself, I will post pictures when it is put in.

*Oct. 18th-Two months since Shawn has been gone. Trying to move on, but miss him more and more every day.

I've been trying to find my "new normal", I don't think I will ever be "normal" again. I still haven't gone back to work. I don't think I will until after the Holidays are over. Right now I'm taking it one day at a time and seeing what happens.

Once again, sorry this got so long with the pictures, but I wanted to catch up any new readers with the Big 50th post! So much has changed since starting this blog. Thank you to all my readers, each and every one of you!! You have all been great and have given me such great words of advise and encouragement.

Here is to 50 more posts!!!