Why???

I know I haven't been blogging for very long, and I'm sorry, but this is going to be a pitty me post. I need to get a few things off my chest.

My husband and I have not had a very good week. The two of us are fine, our marriage is great, but life in general is kind of sucking.

See my husband has a very difficult job, and it is all political. (who would have thought college football coaching would be political, man talk about drama) It doesn't necessarily go by how good he is at his job, but instead it goes by who he knows and what they can do for him in order to set up for the future. And when you are just starting out, you don't know many people. In turn he has gotten stuck doing every shitty job ever asked of him. He has worked his ass off for the last 5 years. I'm not just saying that because he is my husband and I love him to death. But he really has worked harder than anyone I know during the last 5 years. He has not only done his job description, but has "filled" in when other people can't do their job. Everyone always gives him the important things to get done. Why you ask? Because everyone knows that when he does something, it will get done right. Anyways I could go on and on. But I think you get the gist of what I'm saying.

All I'm asking for is that my husband gets the opportunity that he so desperately deserves. I want him to wake up in the morning excited about his job, the way he was when he first started out in the profession. I'm sick and tired of him getting screwed out of a job, that he is more than qualified for, because some rich ass kid's daddy made a phone call and got him the job when he hasn't worked hard enough to earn anything. Especially when my husband has put in more than his fair share of grunt and background work. I just want him to be happy.

As far as me. I just want to have a baby. That's all I've ever wanted is to have a family. I've always wanted to be the best wife and mother, that I could be. That was my dream when I was a little girl. I know I (we) have only been trying for 11 cycles, but it is starting to get very frustrating. And more than that I'm starting to wonder more and more everyday, if there is some sort of problem, as to why it hasn't happened for us yet. And that scares the shit right out of me. We have decided that if I don't get pregnant this month, then we will go ahead and get some testing done in July. I talked to my Dr. about this, and he is on board, with taking the next step.

So in a nutshell all I want is for us to be happy. Is that too much to ask for?
We are good people, who have worked really hard and deserve to be happy. I'm not asking for unrealistic trivial objects to make us happy like, gold, diamonds, and furs. I just want us to make enough money to live a "comfortable life", for my husband to wake up happy and love going to work, instead of being miserable day after day, and thinking about giving up his dream because he can't catch a break.

A job that my husband loves and a perfect little baby, so we can start our family, is that too much to ask for in life? Happiness and a family???

Sorry this got so long, but it has been building all week, and I needed to get it off my chest.